Yesterday I got a dose of adrenaline and compete energy when I heard that one of the women at the retail store where I work had higher sales and might be up for a promotion. I immediately noticed my body go into constriction and my Survival #2 fight and compete energy get ignited.
This adrenalized survival energy initially motivated me to work on marketing techniques and strategies to increase sales and traffic into our retail store. I noticed that I was exhausted after vigorously typing up all the notes.
On my lunch break, I decided to rest in my car and listen to the Professional Purpose call from the prior week to help me unwind. I noticed as I rested one hand on my heart and one hand on my belly and took some deep oxytocin breathes, that my monkey mind began to slow down. As Ellie spoke about the oxytocin energy we want to be in when we make sales calls with a desire for connection, I realized that I could loosen my anxiety and stress and repetitive thought pattern of “must make a sale.”
I began to breathe more oxytocin infused breaths naturally and my shoulders softened. I remembered that when I initially started working, I was focused on making a connection. It was about the connection with the person whether they bought something or not. Recently, I had gotten caught up in the pressure to make sales, that I had begun to see each person walking into the store as a body with a $ sign on their heads.
Make a connection. Build trust.
I felt a spaciousness and strength in my body, especially my heart, as I repeated this mantra.
This will naturally lead to a sale if there is alignment.
Make a connection. Build trust.
When I returned from lunch, I focused on connecting with my co-worker, rather than competing and I felt much more ease and friendliness. I connected with a mom and daughter that walked into the store about “what if” they had won the Powerball. We had a good laugh. They bought an outfit and a connection was formed.
I connected with a yoga teacher of an investor who was told she could get whatever she wanted free providing that she wore it in her yoga classes. I noticed the immediate freedom and sense of play that we both had with this concept of free. It was interesting to see the shift when money was no longer a 'but' in the conversation.
It reminded me of being a girl again – my 11th birthday and younger before I had a concept of money. On my birthday and special occasions, my mom would say, “Go have fun! Pick out whatever you like!” We would go to the Disney Store and tween clothing stores. I had so much joyful fun picking out cute outfits. I never looked at the price tag. It wasn’t a ‘but' at that point in my life.
As an adult, when shopping for or selling a product, money has been a continual ‘but’ or block. It is sometimes the first thing that I notice or a customer looks at before really appreciating the beauty or joy of the clothing.
I would love for that to change. Rather than checking the price tag first, look at the outfit first as it is, and feel the fabrics. Try it on and ask internally, “Do I love it? Does it bring me giggling childlike joy throughout my whole body?”
It is exactly this childlike joy that I witnessed as I saw the yoga teacher try on so many gorgeous outfits. There was one in particular, a baby blue cashmere drape. She was a brunette who usually chose bold red colors, however, when she tried on this baby blue drape, there was a sense of contagious joy that emerged. She put it on and softness came over her face – a pure joy, like a child giggling. She smiled and cuddled in the cashmere drape. I told her that her face said it all. It brought out a unique softness and joy in her that the other outfits did not. It was not an experience or logical decision from her mind, it was a pure visceral experience and that said it all.
These experiences got me wondering what if money was no object – what if there was always this sense of freedom, fun, and play when making a purchases? What if there was always this sense of ease when selling a product or service?
What a joy! What a joy to move from adrenaline to oxytocin. What a joy to move from competition to collaboration. What a joy to move from sell sell sell to connect connect connect. What a joy to release the ‘buts’ around money and move into visceral joyfulness when shopping, purchasing, and selling. In a day like this, it is incredible to have the tools to transition within one afternoon from surviving to thriving. This is how I reside and live as a BraveHeart Woman.