I was happy to finally receive a diagnose, this illness had been a mystery to me for way too long now almost taking 15 years of my life. I could identify it now, it no longer being able to hide.
Healers advised me to not call it by its name as they felt I would now further claim it however I knew for me that was not true, it could no longer hide, I could name it now.
I first caught glimpses of it in my early twenties however it was still manageable and there would be days the sores in my mouth rendered me speechless, the pain being so bad I could not open my mouth. They would disappear as quickly as they came and no one knew what they where or why.
I started my journey on alternative healing or just different ways for a body to heal was what I called it, I was open to all. I knew each healer whether it be a doctor or Reiki Master came to me with the greatest intentions. I was a nurse and I also signing up for just about every energy healing class I could find and all helped until my daughter was born and after her birth it seems like this illness was winning.
I was tested for every disease imaginable, my doctors nervous that I may have contracted AIDs/HiV as I had been nursing in the 80’s and had had blood contact and received a few needle picks over years. Each time I was tested it felt like a held my breath until the results came back, what if results where positive and I may have infected my husband and daughter.
I now spent weeks not being able to speak, I would wake up in the middle of the night my mouth glued shut with blood.
My doctor would cauterizes these sores every other day to stop them from spreading down my throat, it was a treatment I welcomed even though it was very painful.
I continued to use different healing avenues, like Reiki, Chiropractic, Energy work, BARs, did endless cleanses, even sweat lodges .while also continuing to learn everything I could about releasing the past, including past lives. Past lives was something I had known about since I was a small child and I could easily tell people about their past lives however one day a nun told if I ever mentioned them again I would go to hell and never see God again. I stopped that day as I had been led to believe she knew more than me also she was an adult and I was 8 years old. I do know now that she was actually trying to help me within her belief system.
Many days I felt hopeless and I would look at my daughter who was now feeling very comfortable around healers as it was now part of her daily routine and I would wonder what was going to happen as I knew I could not continue to live like this. Of course we had wonderful times together and thank goodness for nature, TV and music on days that I could not speak we could always dance, feed birds, dig up bugs and Barney on TV would do the talking.
I could still smile, hold her and love her. My husband traveled a lot with his job and I don’t have family living in the US so it was challenging.
When Kayleen was almost 3 years old, Edward was transferred to GA, we had lived there before so I was happy to be returning as the climate is amazing.
I found a doctor right away and went to see her the first week we arrive in GA. when she looked in my mouth which only had a few sores that morning she said, "I believe that is Behçet's Disease and added I am not surprised it has not been diagnosed as it is very rare”. She then continued to tell that she did not treat Behcets and would be referring me to a rheumatologist. My visit to the rheumatologist confirmed the diagnosis and I was prescribed 2 medications and an oral rinse for pain and within a week I was symptom free.
I would now speak to this disease calling it by its name demanding that it would tell me its purpose and what I was to release and learn from it. I no longer felt it was my enemy just another life force, it was energy and all energy can be transmuted. It was smarter than I knew, it revealed to me a me that I had forgotten existed, a wise, determined persistence me. I opened myself back up to my gifts the empath, the sage I was born to be and no longer felt the need to silence myself.
I continue to enhance my healing abilities however every time I stopped taking the medication the symptoms would reappear yet I was thriving again.
I was coaching and had a small Reiki practice, I opened up my own CPR and First Aid company and started working as the nurse at my daughter’s school. My doctors where concerned that I would become to tired as rest was part of my treatment plan.
I knew that there was something I needed to learn however I had not discovered what that was yet.
One evening I received a email from BraveHeart Women, a Dr. Ellie Drake was holding a webinar the next day and I was invited to listen. I had never heard of BHW or Ellie yet something about that email resonated with me so I signed up. Before the call my mind was already getting in the way so I told myself I would stay on the call for 10 min, this was something I had learned from my illness, I would say “Adrienne can you do it for another 1min or 5 min that is sometimes how I got through my day just min to min. 60 min later I did not want the call to end, I drank in Dr Drakes words (now Ellie to me) she knew about the human body and the spirit her message was grounded and I knew I desired more of what she teaching. I signed up that evening for BHW core membership.
I discovered the oxytocin breath, the female prosperity hormone hahhhhhhhh. I practiced this breath daily, it was different and sounded strange to me however I loved how my body felt during and after. This breath became part of my daily practice, 3 Oxy breaths before I got out of bed, a few more as I entered the kitchen and 3 before I put my car in reverse to leave my driveway. I was allowing EASE in my body and in my life.
I decided to receive more BraveHeart Women tools so I traveled to CA to become part of the Resonator program. Then traveled to Jerusalem as part of the “My name is Harmony” global project and then to NZ to be certified as a FBE facilitator . I knew what I was receiving and choose to share this with women in my community and in my coaching practice. I am now a Female Success Model coach within the BraveHeart Women Community and Female Success Model group facilitator. I meet women from all other the world us sharing our gems and insights.
Yes I can speak, my mouth wide open with no more sores to limit me and I am now medication free for 4 years.
I am so grateful for all the sacred healers in my life, each one bringing their gifts to me and each one I send blessing to even the ones who could not assist me as I know if they could they would.
I invite you to connect with me, maybe you are in a rut, or numb to the possibilities of you or maybe you have an illness that is weighing you down to your true potential.
Life is around us, and everything is vibration and this moment is a new one receive it, hahhhhhhhh omph!