When joined in holy matrimony, two people vow to be with each other in sickness and in health, and until death does them apart. But, this is not the case in most marriages. In fact, according to the
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the current divorce rate is 3.6 per 1,000 population. It also states that the current marriage rate is 6.8 per 1,000 population. This means nearly one out of every two marriages in America ends up in divorce.
Divorce can be one of the most difficult times in your life. Enduring divorce proceedings is easier said than done, especially if children are involved. Even an amicable divorce can bring out the worst in people. It is, therefore, important to maintain your mental well-being during the process. We have enlisted seven tried-and-tested ways that can help you to cope with it.
1. Forgive Your Partner
In most cases, both partners are equally responsible for a divorce. As both of you share a part of the blame, it is better to forgive your partner. This is the hardest, but a necessary step to move on with your life. Most people hold onto their grief, ruining their relationship with family and friends. Once you have overcome the grief, you will be ready to make a fresh start.
2. Hire a Competent Divorce Attorney
You should speak with your lawyer before filing for divorce. If you are going through a mutually agreeable separation, you may be able to explore legal options other than divorce. In short, you need to consult a competent lawyer before making the decision. Hire a lawyer who can handle this arduous process as sensibly as possible. It doesn’t matter whether he/she has been practicing family law in Poughkeepsie or in a high-profile law firm in Boston. You certainly don’t want to work with an over-aggressive attorney who will unnecessarily blow your case out of proportion.
3. Be Honest with Your Attorney
Being honest with your attorney at all times is one of the best things you can do. Tell him/her everything to know, including your mistakes that may have contributed to the divorce. Your attorney may also ask you several questions, and while the answers may be painful, you need to respond openly. Being honest with your attorney will help strengthen your case.
4. Seek Emotional Support
You may feel sadness, fear, relief, confusion, and anger repeatedly throughout the process, which is totally natural. If you begin to feel overwhelmed by your emotions, talk to someone. You may seek emotional support from a family member or a close friend. Don’t be afraid to ask for assistance to make this process as smooth as possible, especially if you have children. Instead of sitting in your apartment, go out with your friends or family members. Try to live a normal life.
A divorce can be highly stressful emotionally, so just hiring a competent attorney may not be enough. Besides, you can seek professional help if you don’t feel like bothering your friends and family members. You may consider hiring a divorce coach to help you fight the stress and the depression stemming from your separation. A divorce coach is your reliable confidant during and after a divorce.
5. Reconnect with Family and Friends
Spend time with a friend who makes you laugh with his/her cool sense of humor. Stay away from negative people who are likely to make you even more depressed. Most people going through a divorce often spend hours curled up in their beds instead of doing something about it. In fact, dressing up and going out with your friends can change your mood dramatically. This is what supportive family and friends are for – to cheer you up and uplift your mood when you need it the most.
6. Eat Regular and Healthy Meals
Most people lose their appetite as a side-effect of the emotional stress experienced when going through a divorce. But, missing meals is exactly the opposite of what you should be doing. An empty stomach is going to make you feel irritated and tired. So, eat your meals regularly. In fact, you should eat as much healthy food as possible because eating too much high-carb food will contribute to your depression.
7. Work up a Sweat
Regular physical exercise helps lift your spirit. It releases endorphins, which help to vent frustration and bitterness. It can be anything, from a regular jog in the fresh morning air to stretching your legs in the park every evening. Regular cycling or walking your dog can work wonders to make you feel good. Yoga and meditation can help reduce the stress and the anxiety associated with divorce. You need to do whatever you can to work off a bad mood.
The key to coping with divorce is to maintain a positive attitude throughout the process. If you are mentally fit from inside, you can easily fight other challenges like increasing finances, handling a difficult ex, dealing with lawyers, co-parenting, and telling others about your divorce, etc. These seven ways will help you to cope with your divorce.